Boys don't like 'em harems

Remember those premature trend predictions? Rewind 2008, hints of the harem being hailed as the new skinny jean? I shrugged I smirked and I laughed behind my glossy mags at those trend experts (no offense I'm fascinated by the journey of fashion trends and everything but it did read as quite comical ...to begin with)of which I normally respect and admire: for they are the top secret fashion spies here to save our day and stock our beloved retail stores with nice pretty clothes,not to mention tip off fashion editors and fill our glossy magazines with even more glossy dreamy runway editorials.
But really harems?Come on!Hmm yeah were see there's two years to go yet but were see if the harem hits our highstreet and becomes swiftly adopted by the fashion elite before you can say Aladdin.

One year on '09,and oh my gawwd how do they do that? 'Em fashion insiders have physic abilities and magical powers,the harem has indeed been very much hailed and has just frigging invaded every runway across the globe.The evidence? Pictures splashed across all the BIG guns Elle, Vogue, Style all with their own versions of how to style the harem all completely hideous yet cunningly, all completely valid too. Now only the E's and V's of this world can do that.Convince us wardrobe conscious souls that the harem is 2009's key silhouette, back from the dead...be afraid be very afraid, they used THAT term 'key' as in won't be going anywhere any time soon, as in the same term used when skinny jeans made their come back appearance, as in ain't no micro trend.
Like I said be scared.
Yikes fast forward to now 2010.Many other trends have already been and gone, some remain strong such as yes, yes congrats you've guessed it-harems still hanging around in various colours and patterns with newly coined names attached to them...tribal, Gypsy,Jungle,Aladdin (Okay so one of the names have been made up by moi)is there no escaping this escalating 'Key silhouette' ridiculous trend?
Everything about the harem is to be feared,slouchy cut, clumsy cropped leg, high gathered waist alarm bells should seriously be ringing- very loudly!








...present day couldn't help but notice how my local Newlook branch have several (please don't make me say it) h-a-r-e-m pants hanging off the rails, along with Riverisland and Topper's.And I remain pondering whether to do it or not. Will it be fashion suicide, will it be one of those style cringe moments that despite all my power I could never succeed to erase?
I enter Newlook, gravitate towards the harem vortex so full of promise when judging by their window display, and posters of long-limbed models.Right, right I'm ready I quickly grab a pair going against all my common sense, mmm zebra print nice embracing the jungle vibe. Wait, wait maybe these are too jungle book? I reverse into the harem vortex and pick up navy ditsy print polka dot version.
I take my tag into the changing room, remove myself out from my comfort zone (vintage dress, waist coat, clogs), when I over hear a couples convo.
Girlfriend: "I love these, I saw Fearn Cotton wear these exact ones, whatch'a think, they're cute right I won't wear them with these shoes though...well ?"
Boyfriend:"Are you sure or what? They look daft they make all girls look ugly, you look like you've just shit yourself,nahh I don't like 'emm babes. What were those other trousers you chose, they're nice babe."
...the heavy harem debate continued, with the devastated GF sharply hitting back with some line about how she hates her BF's tight white skinny jeans and "indie rock" look, slagging off his guitar skills or lack of.It's a tricky little trend recking otherwise healthy relationships.Is this not reason enough to avoid the harem at all costs?
Yeah it was, up until I visited Topshop and spotted military style harems with gold button pocket detail in the final clearance sale (does this mean R.I.P for the stubborn harem trend?She prays)a few quid. Yes I did. Why I don't know? Curiosity perhaps?
My harem outfit slash tragedy shall be documented right here.